The Christian Depression

My LORD, how shall I dispel my hurt?
Where shall I release my anguish?
If I am not to sully the image of another, who will hear my pain?
If I keep these things within me,
How will my problems be solved?
From whom shall I seek my solution?
My tears might fall, but still the swell of bitterness lies within my heart and soul.

When I seek, I sometimes not find.
When I ask, I don't necessarily get an answer.
Sometimes I'm afraid to knock; what if I do and there's no one there?
But one thing I can open is the Bible.
One place I can find the answer is my heart where you reside.
I close my eyes for even without them I see you.
My memories, my present, my future.
I see you.
You are indeed my everlasting God.

Again I am faced with a conflicting heart and mind LORD.
My heart wants, but my mind convinces it otherwise.
Heart and mind find satisfaction in different things.
Do I bring it up or leave it?
You take first place in our loves, yet how can we say everything else is not important?
You'll provide, that I know, yet... what if we yearn for more?
How could we decide?

I face uncertainty every single day
A day spent without communication with you happens often.
It's so convenient, yet Prayer is the most natural and normal response for a heart that is dependent on God.
Tell me LORD, what do you say?