I'll Be Back

It is sometimes very difficult to accept reality.

You either don't want to, or you have not realised what that reality is.

What's the next best step to take?

Buddy... If I knew... I won't be getting my degree in Economics...

I've mentioned before that I hate this feeling of uncertainty...

I do.

Now, I'm simply struggling with what my reality is.

Help from others?

Uhm... not easy, maybe impossible.
Or maybe I just don't want it.

Help from God?

I've been praying...
But this got to me
"Why do we find it natural to pray for rain or shine, but silly to pray for an eclipse?"

I think I'm lost...
In fact, I've lost many things...
Weight included.
I look horrible now.
If I listed all I lost... you would think very badly of me...

Even my self-worth has been diminishing.

Maybe I should not care so much.
Maybe I should take something up.
Something that'll make me happy, something that I'm actually good at.

Pardon me...
Indulge me a little...
I'll stop my whining soon.
I'll pick myself up once I find which hole I've fallen into.

I'm independent, I'm strong.
Yet sometimes... It's hard to stay that way.
So maybe I'm not...

But make no mistake.
I'll be back...